Gay Of Thrones Makes All Men Cum

With the release of Game of Thrones season 7 just around the corner and with the sad news today that we won’t get season 8 until 2019 I thought I’d do my review on the Men.com porn parody series “Gay of Thrones”. Now, as a recent newcomer to the HBO series, having only seen it in its entirety only a few months ago, I was quite excited to see how the gay porn studio turns it into an adult movie. I got the DVD from an Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle Centre and when I had my first chance alone I popped it on.

The first scene starts off with Toby Dutch as Daenerys Targaryen who stands by a river. We then see Abraham Al Malek as Khal Drogo. The costumes are made extremely well and they have done the characters justice. They went as far as making Daenerys hair white and Al Malek had the same blue tattooing as the character.

Daenerys Targaryen in Gay Of Throne
Image: Daenerys Targaryen

Now in this first scene, they get right to the action. No story set up, no talking between the characters, they just start having sex. I’m not sure if they took this approach to replicate the show, as these two characters have very little dialogue between them, but a little story set-up would have been nice. I can’t even say that the chemistry was great between the actors, but again, I’m not sure if that was to capture the characters or not, but it felt rather disjointed. The fact that it was outside was hot though. It was a fairly basic scene, they change positions a few times and then finish with Daenerys taming Drogo’s dragon.

Khal Drogo in Gay Of Throne
Image: Khal Drogo

The next scene we see Paul Walker, Loras Tyrell and Dato Foland as Renly Baratheon. The set-piece is very representative of the show and I felt they captured that aspect well. There is some dialogue as Tyrell shaves Baratheons chest. Soon after they start to get into the action. There’s more passion between the two actors this time and it feels like they have done the characters justice as they are lovers in the series. After switching positions and roles a few times they have their happy ending. They share a passionate kiss and Tyrell tells Baratheon he thinks he would be a good king. I’m sure he does after the battle they just had.

In the next scene, we see Damien Crosse as Oberyn Martell and Christopher Daniels as Olyvar. It begins with Olyvar offering Oberyn a line-up of beautiful young prostitutes to which he inspects them very closely but dismisses them, only to order Olyvar to stay. He gives himself to Oberyn, to which he has no qualms with whatsoever. He strips and drops to his knees. In this scene, Damien Cross is very dominant and forceful but passionate. I think it is really hot and very true to the character himself. He knows what he wants and he takes it!

Keeping true to the series the set pieces are very believable and add to the Game of Thrones Universe. The actors have great chemistry and work very well together! I’m a big fan of Crosse and love him as the character of Oberyn Martell. The characters change positions and use the entire room, which I think is a good detail. After they have finished their battle, Oberyn orders Olyvar to put his clothes on and get back to the boys.

Renly Baratheon in Gay Of Throne
Image: Renly Baratheon

The final scene shows Colby Keller as Daario Naharis and Toby Dutch return as Daenerys Targaryen. It starts off with a voiceover, which I found odd as none of the other scenes had a little story to begin with. It shows that Naharis had captured Daenerys to take him to his lord. As he is taking Daenerys to be locked up, he takes Daenerys for himself beforehand. He claims there are two things he excels at; War and men. He has already had a war, so now he is taking the man for himself.

This scene takes place in what looks like some old ruins, and I think that’s really hot. The men start to do their battle and not long till their swords are drawn. The men were somewhat passionate but this scene to me wasn’t overly thrilling. They go at it and have an explosive conclusion to their battle.

Overall, I felt like this movie was lacklustre. It would have been so much better with more story and more dialogue added to it. I know its porn but the corny innuendos and cheesy acting would have been fun for this fantasy series. They definitely could have elaborated on the characters and how they got to be where they were. It just needed a little more elaboration to make it more like Game of Thrones. Take away the costuming and the backdrops (all of which I think were great) you wouldn’t have known this was Game of Thrones related at all.

I give this gay adult movie with butt-centric sex 2 battle swords out of 5.

Author: Brett is a consultant from Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle Centres

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